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europeans_dig_fat_chicks
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Name: krystian
Country: Bangladesh
Birthday: 8/23/1985
Gender: Female
Interests: living on the "edge"... legally. no drugs or anything of the sort, good clean edge walking. i like to mosh, listen to music, crowd surf, go out for coffee, and do random sillyness
Expertise: i like to make random objects in my art classes... does that count?
Occupation: Student
Industry: Art
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
4/23/2003
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| well, i'm not quite sure what to think when i look back on all these entries.
god - i know he's there, but sometimes i just want to ignore him -- things would seem to be a bit easier if i did. =sigh=
shannon and i talk about this a lot. when you clear your closet of all your demons, then they come back and attack you 7 fold. and that's exactly what's happening. =( i don't deal well with peer pressure guys. and that upsets me. i just want... to be happy... but i want to do things my own way to be happy. =\ but you know. whatever. | | |
| so, i came home and there were still the same issues facing me. even though the middle schoolers had taught me a great lesson in patients, i still cannot seem to find myself keeping a calm mind when it comes to my mom. i haven't really had to deal with bruce yet, but that comes with time.
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| not everybody from my ohter journal directly knows about this one, but everybody from this journal can directly know of the other.
couldn't do a link. xanga hates me.
do a search for me anytime before 8pm and after 12am (if you don't have premium). europeans_dig_fat_chicks... is also known as emu_llama (emu_llama being the other journal) | | |
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life.
it sucks a lot.
sometimes it feels as if there is nothing to smile about. yet i continue to face each day with renewed hope that this time, it will be different; better somehow. but it never is. the same bitterness, the same let downs, the same problems wake up at the same time that i do and start to weigh me down again. sometimes, i start to feel the weight of these problems and i just want to break down and let overwhelming depression wash over me go comotose. sometimes i wish that i could end all bodily functions, curl up in a ball and stop participating in the world. but i never do. instead i bare it all with a smile. cause i know that there can be things worth smiling about and i cling to those moments until another one comes along. it's nice to have moments like those, that get you through the day. like when patrick told me he looked up to me. i don't know if he realized the effect that had on me. just small things like that. and what's great is that for every 1 compliment i've gotten, i've recieved 600 put downs. i only remember about 60 of those. but i remember almost every compliment. it's amazing what an upbeat outlook can do for a person. | | | |
| life is great when everything falls down around you. it makes you rely on God even more, reevaluate things, and appreciate what you do have.
god and i had a nice long coversation the other day. it was really nice. i don't spend nearly enough time with him. i should spend a lot more. he's so freaken amazing. yay team God. | | |
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